Friday, March 23, 2012

Update 2012

Wow, it's really been a year now? I haven't visited this blog in a while. I'm sure no one else has either, haha. Well I wanted to read about the anxiety attack I had because I've been feeling a little bit of tightness in my throat lately, but work has been very stressful. I keep half- and quarter- cuts of Xanax in my pockets just in case it gets too much for me. Since it seems to creep up whenever I'm stressed, I'm thinking that last year the anxiety got out of control because I had been laid off from work and not having much luck finding a new job.

As for my eyelashes, I've reduced how often I put on the Careprost to about 2-3 times a week. And, honestly, my lashes are still full and long but not as much as when I had been using it every day. Since I know it takes 12 weeks from the time I start applying it every day, I know I won't see the results for a while but I miss how long they used to be! So I'm probably going to go back to applying Careprost DAILY.
My mom noticed my lashes and I shared a few bottles of Careprost with her and -- her lashes are amazing! She loves the stuff and I gave her some more for Christmas. But she was going through it pretty fast so I told her she only needs about half a drop. I have 2.5 bottles left still. I hope by the time I need more, it won't be off the market or have the price jacked up too high.
I don't remember if I mentioned this side effect: if I happen to get any Careprost in my eye, I notice that within that week I experience either too much or too little pressure in my eye to where parts of my peripheral vision seem to go temporarily blind (like when you push on your eyeball for too long and things start to fade). But it goes away after about half an hour. I have tried to be very careful to not get it into my eyes and haven't had this problem since.

As for normal life, WORK IS SO STRESSFUL! Yeah I said it twice, but I mean it twice. It's just too much for me. Maybe there are other folks who can handle it but I am most certainly not the type. I shouldn't have to come home crying every night, with my brain hurting. I've put in a request to switch my schedule to the overnights, but they seem pretty adamant about keeping me on the swing shifts. I will keep trying. Maybe switch to POOL only, so I can pick which days I work and which times and HOW OFTEN! Ha... love that part. Or maybe I will pursue a different career altogether. I've been saying a lot of prayers on the subject, and I'm hoping that the Lord will help me out on this, as He usually does when I ask.

About when I'm getting married to Jason: Still waiting to hear from the First Presidency, but of course, now they're getting ready for General Conference so we're experiencing even more delays. It's like we've gone through so many (delays) that more would almost be welcome because its the norm, and I'm afraid of what it might possibly be like to be moving forward, being that it is such a foreign concept. The right person, at the right time, by the right authority. So I'm just hoping that the Lord's timing is best, as usual, and I'm counting on that so I don't give up. Unless He wants me to? I don't know how to read any of it. I asked Him to put up roadblocks if it's not meant to be, but this feels equally as trying as a test of faith, so I'm not sure how to interpret it. I know I need the Spirit more in my life to figure it out, so that's what I'm working on.

1 comment:

Mommy said...

Can you believe I am on here??? Haha! I lol'd on the eyelash thing. I'm not using as much as I used to either. In fact, I haven't even tapped into the bottles you got me for Christmas! I thought I was nearly out at that time. Well if you need help at some point paying for these, do NOT hesitate to call me ok?

I love you!!!!!!!!!!!

ps - your lashes are still beautiful!!! :)